All posts by MerNicole

Very good news for botulism sufferers

this was sent from moderator of the Facebook Botox/dysport group.

I hope this message provides hope to all.

We already know botox isn’t made for everyone – I don’t think we need anymore reminders of that .  Hope we can continue to move forward and post proactive posts.


Btw my own two cents is its botulism in some then it can activate fungal like infections and damage already comprised immune systems in others. Obviously both outcomes act on immune system /CNS . So basically test for underlying active infections especially high Epstein bar .

Getting tests done by LLMD/MTHFR

I have a long complicated story but essentially was feeling “better” with the help of valproic acid and lorazepam . I hit a tolerance and had to come off of the lorazepam after several years and all of my symptoms plus many others came back.

I had about ten different tests run last week looking at toxicities, mold, lymes,  autoimmunity, and inflammation. I will be happy to share results when I get them.

Prior to botox I had a terrible time getting off of ativan and with general anesthesia in the past. I found out I had a specific type of the MTHFR gene mutation the 667t or c I believe, which means I have trouble with methylation. This translates into me being a terrible detoxifier. My body has an incredibly hard time breaking down toxins and eliminating them. This MTHRF gene is said to be the smoking gun behind why some people get sick from mold and others don’t or why some people smell perfume and get sick and others are fine. Inflammation is what ultimately results from not being about to properly deal with these environmental toxins/neurotoxins.

I will update this post when I can with any info that I find might be helpful as I get these test results. I want to encourage you to get the MTHFR test. Supposedly taking methylated versions of all vitamins especially methyl folic acid is essential. I really think we need to be looking at why some people get so sick from benzos or botox, chemical sensitivities and the inflammatory response etc. There is a reason beyond just being unlucky as to why our bodies reacted the way it did. And in no way-I repeat- NO WAY does that take the blame off of companies like allergan who know certain people should stay the hell away from this crap. If they were to say “chances are you’ll be fine” that woudn’t sell tons on their product. Very upsetting the info they hide.

Role of meds/benzos


this started several years ago for me after I was going through a withdrawal from benzodiazepines. Why I thought a neurotoxin to the head was what I needed then I dont know. Anyway I felt I needed to go back on benzos back then since nothing else was working and I was losing my mind. The symptoms instantly got much better where I woulc tolerate them and live. Just recently I got off of the benzos and the depakote I started taking for my symptoms. I feel worse than ever before. I am wondering if what iv been experiencing was the original withdrawal all along that left me vulnerable to the botox. Or in other words I had a very vulnerable nervous system to start with and the botox was like adding fuel to the fire. So Now Im not sure what Im experiencing. I guess just trying to heal from an injured nervous system. I am not taking any meds now because I am hoping to slowly get better on my own. I dont seem to do ewll with meds and they dont seem to heal only mask. Does anyone have similar experience>?

Suffering from France

I went on a pilgrimage to france for healing (Lourdes). I don’t know if it’s the jet lag or the schedule but I feel worse. Today is the one year anniversary of my injections. I feel so sad and alone. My Ativan is not working so well anymore. I’m getting the constant headaches still but they seem even worse. My eyes are so sensitive I have to skIp out on a lot of the activities that the other people in need of healing are doing. And I still feel so disconnected and disoriented one f the scariest things…not like the old me…lots of tears….I don’t know how to deal with this. I missed the support from this group,and needed to write. Thanks for being here.


Susan from texas

She has been a been support source to me and we used to talk often. Does anyone have Susan S’ number from Texas? If so let her know I would like to get in touch with her. I will try searching for the email she sent me a while back on botox. What happened is I had to do a factory reset on my android since my gmail was no longer linked to it. I stupidly jumped the gun and lost my contacts and pictures etc.


Thanks so much



What the depression thread taken down?

Hi Anne -I got your response I just didnt know where to post back. Thank you for caring so much its nice to have people on here like you. Im still suffering each day with something I cant really describe. As iv said in the past its sort of feeling like im half awake even though Im not necessarily tired, its like a dream-like state. I could also describe it as disconnected or depersonalized is the term I think. Anyway learning to cope but its hard. I also get headaches and sensitivity to light and sound constantly. If theres no headache theres pressure and sensitivity issues.

feeling depressed

I feel like I’m in a dark hole ans can’t climb out. My neuro psychiatrist is treating my headaches first. Iv never felt so depressed in my life. This is not me. My head just feels sick and I don’t want to do anything. I have ativan that works less and less. This is so bad..I feel like I’m under water and so distant. Hoping I’m not alone and I can get better.

really need encouragment

Hi. I we are all going through troubled times right now so I hate to ask for special favors. I feel like I cannot handle what’s happening in my head anymore. I am shut out from the world and feel like iv been trapped in a bubble. Im seeing a neuropsychiatrist that put me back on ativan…it barely takes the edge off for about an hour or two. Its hard to describe what its like..I feel disconnected ..confused depressed anxious and fearful. Its constant…things don’t look the same to me I don’t have the same feelings I did for my family boyfriend etc. I’m trapped somewhere I don’t recognize. Its taken on much more than brain fog . Its frightening and I don’t know who I am anymore. Not to mention the terrible thoughts about everything . I really can’t take this anymore. Any advice would be appreciated. I don’t know were else to go. Iv been stuck in the house a lot in part due to the horrendous headaches. I wish someone could help.. a Med..anything. I don’t know how to cope anymore.

Question about meds

Hi again-

So I don’t know what’s wrong with me but it’s been three months and it seems I’m deeper than ever in this. I have terrible head symptoms. I am fearful 24/7 and feel very detached and living in a foggy bubble. And much as Id like to do the natural route I’m really really struggling. I am wondering if anyone would be willing to share their experience with medications post botox.

I’m trying to be patient but I’m getting discouraged and I’m worn out. Btw iv tried many natural supplements.

Thank you

interesting article

Botox Maker Faces Lawsuit From Doctors BY ALEXANDER LAW GROUP ON APRIL 30, 2010 » ADD THE FIRST COMMENT.

When a business chooses to operate outside the law and with arrogant disregard for the health of its customers, those unethical choices will eventually catch up with the company. That’s what’s happening now with Allergan and itsparalyzing cosmetic, Botox.

For years I’ve been writing about the dangers of Botox and the marketing practices of Allergan. A major lawsuit against the company has always seemed inevitable, so you can put this one in the “I Told You So” category.

Ever since Allergan realized that Botox could earn huge profits, the pharmaceutical giant has been using a business model that treats FDA regulations and patient safety as nothing but minor obstacles on its road to even bigger sales. Instead of following the rules and making patient safety its top priority, Allergan has done everything within its marketing power to get Botox into the hands of more doctors and into the veins of more seekers of that famous “Frozen Face” look, especially its target market of women 35-55 with incomes above $55,000.

The irony of this class action lawsuit is that, unlike many others filed against Allergan, it did not come from the FDA or from a Botox patient who experienced a personal injury or the family of a patient who suffered a wrongful death.

Instead, this lawsuit has come from Allergan’s own partners in the glorification of Botox. Dr. Ivan Goldsmith of Las Vegas, who is the lead plaintiff, and more than 100 other doctors have brought the suit. They charge that Allergan has been scamming them by promoting a business model that has only two possible outcomes for the doctors. Either they must break the law or they must lose money.

The basis of their lawsuit is that Allergan charged doctors more for a vial of Botox than they could possibly earn for treatments if they used the toxin in each vial for only one patient, which inconveniently happens to be what the law requires. In order to earn the huge profits that Allergan promised, the doctors would have to spread the contents of each vial among several patients, and that’s a violation of the most basic rules of hygiene, as well as the regulations that cover Botox.

But Allergan never lets little annoyances like laws, hygiene, and patient safety stand between it and its profits. The company has actually built its business by falsely marketing Botox for off-label uses. The only FDA-approved cosmetic use for Botox is the treatment of glabellar lines, which are the wrinkles between the eyebrows, but Allergan does everything possible to obscure that limitation. One Botox brochure proudly states that the product has “20 uses in 75 countries”.

A typical Botox treatment requires about 20 units of the neurotoxin, and the cost is between $300 and $500 per patient. However, the suit charges that the price of a vial of Botox ranges from $400 to more than $1000, which makes it tough to for a doctor to treat only one patient and turn a profit.

Originally, Allergan sold Botox only in 100-unit vials. In May 2008, Allergan introduced 50-unit vials, but they still contain 30 units more than a typical treatment requires. That means that the doctors either have to waste 30 units and lose money or use the contents of the vials on more than one patient and make money.

Allergan, of course, has always promoted the off-label, multi-patient, “Botox Party” approach, and has marketed it heavily and successfully. That system was working well for Dr. Goldsmith until another doctor pointed out to him that each Botox vial has a single use limit.

That bit of sad news was the beginning of this lawsuit, but don’t feel any sympathy for the doctors involved. They’re hardly innocent. By filing the lawsuit, they’ve admitted their own wrongdoing. They were treating patients with a Black Box drug even though they had not read the label, which states, “Botox is supplied in a single use vial.” Through their own negligent actions, the doctors were exposing their patients to HIV, Hepatitis B and Hepatitis C.

This is a lawsuit without any good guys. Allergan has made a practice of falsely marketing Botox and trying to cheat the doctors who are actually responsible for delivering it to the end users. That’s a bad business model.

Doctors who administer a potent drug without reading the label are putting their patients in grave danger. Together, Allergan and many doctors have made Botox treatment even riskier than it already is.

Anyone needing help for a Botox problem can talk to an experienced lawyer by contacting us. There is no charge. All work is performed on a contingency basis. If we don’t collect, you owe nothing. We never charge for taking a call or making one.


Richard Alexander